Monday 26 April 2021

Cynthia Ann and Quanah - you don't want to miss them


Source: My daughters and I went to Barnes and Noble where I got stuck in the Native American section. There are no chairs in there now, to discourage lingering in light of Covid I suppose. I ended up lingering on the floor next to this section. I took pictures of interesting looking books and then I checked this one out at the library. 

It was well worth it. Plus, it coincided nicely with Blood Brothers about Cochise - neighboring tribes and similar time period - civil war, pre, and post. These are Comanches, that one was a fictional account but centered on Cochise and the apaches.

Like the Apaches, the Comanches were loosely aligned small tribal groups. There numbers were not expansive even prior to the slaughtering of their buffalo and encroachment and seizure on their ancestral lands. This was partially due to the rigorous horseback lifestyle that made childbearing a challenge. They were the quintessential nomadic hunter-gatherers. They did no farming and moved about every three weeks. I already knew about how the Comanches had mastered horsemanship like no other, having learned from the Spaniards who initially introduced horses to North America. Horses transformed a once incongruous and marginalized tribe into the most powerful and warlike plains people of North America. 

Into this world, Cynthia Ann Parker was inducted at age nine after being taken in a raid on a fort. Her pioneering family: who became prominent Texans, the Parkers, naively left their base camp and fort unprotected and many people were killed and children and one woman abducted. Cynthia Ann, like other young children was eventually adopted into the tribe, married a powerful chief, and bore children. She completely immersed herself in the culture and rejected multiple attempts to be reunited with anglo culture. Finally, after a massive battle she was forcibly taken by whites and returned to her relatives along with her small daughter. She was forced to leave behind her two sons, one of which Quanah - protagonist of this non fiction story and eventual warrior, leader, and reservation politician in later years. Cynthia Ann never assimilated back into anglo world. She continually tried to run away, she was paraded like a circus animal, and died at a heartbreakingly young age, never able to return to her heart tribe and sons. Their way of life was coming to an end.

Another interesting figure of this book was a small in stature Texas Ranger Jack Hays who would go on to revolutionize warfare in the west. He commanded a daring band of border ruffians and trained them to live and fight like Comanches. They eventually got their hands on and helped adapt what would be known as the Walker Colt - the first repeating revolver. Prior to this, the typical easterner with his one long rifle stood little chance against a fearless Comanche who rode at a full gallop with at least 6 weapons to hand. 

The other interesting thing - a portion about the pensive leader Mackenzie who always downplayed his heroism and role so much that few people knew about his merit as a commander and fighter until after his death. The part about Quanah Parker was fascinating. He was a true pragmatist. Once he realized the warrior and buffalo days were over, he embraced the anglo life and became a leader of his people uniting them in a completely novel way and calling himself the first Comanche Chief - he would also be the last.

He cleverly managed to make money on cattle despite the Indian Agency's corruption and the absolute ineptitude of the federal government to reasonably handle or understand the natives. He became friends with his once foe Mackenzie and learned from him. He built an imposing house for his many wives and children and never turned anyone away from his table. He was known for his generosity and lobbied the government for fair treatment. 

Sadly, he died fairly young but left an interesting legacy. 

 



 

Thursday 8 April 2021

Cochise and Tom Jeffers


Source: my grandma

This is a historical novel portraying the relationship between Cochise and Tom Jeffers. It was really well done. I love this book.

Perhaps the creative license with Jeffers' romantic liaisons was a little mushy (little is known of Jeffers romantic relationships and he never officially married) and his depiction of Indian life might be idealized, but all in all it seems to be historically accurate and is thoughtfully and powerfully written.

The saga of white relations with native tribes is painful. The main idea is that a noble individual can rise above the stereotypes and errors of their own race or group and through embracing truth and honor can overcome cross cultural barriers to unite in friendship. 

There is a kind of mysticism that pervades this book. This is one of the reasons why I enjoyed it so much. There is more than just a retelling of events. The book captures the mystical tie that both of these individuals had for the land itself and eventually for one another. 

They faced criticism from their own groups and persecution from without. They held onto a creed that was deep within. As a recovering people pleaser, this profoundly inspires me. 

Like studying the tribal groups of the Eurasian steppes and other groups who lived and thrived in seemingly hostile terrain, the apaches are fascinating. They achieved a mastery over their own bodies that to our times seems supernatural. They had rigid rules of conduct which helped them to remain united and function as a unit. Their leadership was a combination of hereditary but strength based and based on tanistry like in Scotland: 

    "Sometimes the king’s son became tanist, but not because the system of primogeniture was in any way recognized. Indeed, the only principle adopted was that the dignity of chieftainship should descend to the eldest and most worthy of the same blood, who well could be a brother, nephew, or cousin. This system of succession left the headship open to the ambitious and was a frequent source of strife both within families and between clans." https://www.britannica.com/topic/tanistry

Unlike in England where the oldest son inherited, even if he was a raging idiotic lunatic, this system took note of heredity but was largely based on battle prowess and leadership qualities. 
 

Thursday 1 April 2021

Mindset - not just for "Go-Getters"

                                                 



source: sister and bro

I feel like self help books are often written by Type A go-getters. Except for the more new age ones perhaps like Eckhart Tolle's The Power of Now. 

This is no exception.

However, there are some great takeaways even for your less industrious type who wants to pay for wi-fi but maybe not become a CEO. This book fleshes out growth mindset and how it plays out in many arenas: business, sports, parenting, teaching, marriage...

  • imploding the idea of "the natural.
  • embracing a humble, learning, posture - learning from failure and success
  • developing in relationships - the active model - vs. the magical thinking
  • teachers and parents - instilling the growth model
I think one of the things I am most aware of is the difficulty I have in asking for feedback and in accepting criticism. I'm kind of hard on myself already and maybe I feel like I'm already doing enough of a good job in being hard on myself so I don't want to ask someone else to be hard on me?

I'm an hsp (highly sensitive person). How this has played out in my life, is that I trained all the people who love me to never criticize me or be harsh to me because the result was me completely melting down. This type of climate doesn't make for the best self development. I wanted to be a natural at everything and so if I wasn't, I tended not to pursue it. If I received criticism, I tended to want to abandon whatever the said pursuit was. Thankfully, we had a family business in cattle ranching where I was subject to some direction and correction (and it wasn't always conveyed in the most diplomatic manner) - which is probably a saving grace for my character development. I couldn't become a complete egg shell wearer. I also wasn't allowed to quit!

I notice that I'm sometimes reluctant to try very hard. This is falling prey to the "if I fail if I haven't tried hard, than I will somehow shield myself from disappointment." My mom once noticed me doing this in a track race while I was cruising the 800 and not really giving it my all. 

I quit volleyball once because the coach critiqued me. I didn't like his personality and I decided that I didn't care about varsity volleyball. 

I've tried to parent with focusing on effort rather than talent. Praising specific achievements rather than general "smartness," "talent," "athleticism," etc. 

I think just generally combating laziness is the kicker. I have had to apply this to using technology- something that once scared me worse than facing a longhorn steer head on. In college I tried to submit my papers hand written - then I finally started typing them up but was still resistant up until getting my first smart phone 5 years after everyone else I knew had one. 

Thankfully I have people in my life who model G.M. and encourage me to move forward and keep learning and growing. I don't want to be entirely left behind!