Backwoods Coming of Age story which was unexpectedly charming and enjoyable

This book kind of floored me. I thought I only liked fiction books with romance in them. (or that's what I told my students about why I didn't care for Harry Potter apart from the laborious plodding nature of the series. Don't start in on Hermione and Ron and Harry and Jenny - zero romance in those liaisons - ok mini rant done.) I know I have high standards for what I consider to be romantic. It all stems from having been influenced by the Brontes...

This book must have graced the shelves of my childhood home. Why I never read it is beyond me. I do have a fear of books about animals. They always seem to die. I'm still traumatized from Bambi (first movie I ever watched that I recall), Old Yeller, and Where the Red Fern Grows. 

Anyway, my mom passed it on to me saying that she thought I might like it. I do. I love it. I know - did I include that disclaimer about overusing the word love and exclamation points! 

I'm not going to go in depth. I cut my finger open a week or so ago and it hurts to type. Let's just outrage the laws of grammar and list some things: artful nature imagery with just the right amount of detail, characters that continue to surprise and charm - [Grandma Hutto (she's my new mentor), Penny (small but clever and innovative - he's the dad), girthy ma who's sensible and kind of obnoxious, the neighbor family Forresters - raw and rowdy but endearing, Flag the deer - best and worst pet ever] story takes place somewhere in the backwoods of Florida (where the author had moved to and must've done some amazing research because the stuff in here from the dialect to the customs seems legit.)

You get the idea. Well worth the read. No comment about the possibility of animals dying in the end. But the actual theme is more about the dad and his son and his coming of age with the help of his pet and the amazing mentorship of his dad. Talk about knowing how to do stuff...

A Field Scientist, a Woman before her Time, and a Native Knight

Encounter With an Angry God by Carobeth Laird

A while ago (recorded here I believe) I wrote about Tailholt Tales by Frank Latta. He references (and has a forward by) a John P Harrington. There was something fascinating about this guy so I looked him up and found a biography by his wife of a few years Carobeth Laird, called Encounter with an Angry God. Something about his single-minded devotion to his work of recording and capturing the quickly disappearing languages of the Native Americans was fascinating to me. 

I tracked down her book at the library and I thought it might be a bitter memoir about how she was wronged and how she needed to set the record straight about the dude. Instead, I discovered a sweet, honest, forward-thinking, brilliant, kindred spirit kind of soulful person who wrote artfully, candidly, authentically, and with the purpose of conveying the uniqueness of her experience - the character of  Harrington and their work together. 

Harrington was a complex but entirely utilitarian person who had dedicated his life to preserving and recording the languages of the western tribes (particularly Californians.) I think they were married for about 7 years and this was around the time of WWI. He basically saw in her the perfect co-pilot and co-researcher and their marriage was completely unorthodox in that he seemed to exempt himself from any need to protect, provide, or nurture her in any way. She accepted this for a time as she was swept away by his obvious brilliance and the fascination of the work. During this time her parents cared for her daughter and their one daughter they had together which Harrington never invested thought, time, or money in, but saw as an obstacle to his mission. (until she was an adult then they forged a kind of relationship.)

He eventually thought she merited her own independent assignments and he sent her off to New Mexico and then to Parker, Arizona. While in Parker, she had a love at first sight encounter with an indigenous man named George Laird, a member of the Chemehuevi tribe, although his father was of European and Cherokee ancestry. 

They became friends and he became her primary "informant" as they called natives who participated in their research by interpreting words, supplying cultural information, and pronunciation guides etc. George became devoted to her almost instantly even though he was about 24 years older than she (she was about 24 when they met.) He was a jack of all trades, - man of wisdom, humor, solicitous of her care (that would have been appealing!), and one who appreciated nature, poetry, mysticism, and learning. 

George accompanied her back to Washington DC to meet Harrington and the three lived together for some months (awkward!) Harrington didn't seem to perceive that the other two were smitten with one another - he just seemed eager to find out what George (super willing informant) would be willing to share about his language etc. Although Harrington wasn't completely clueless. She remembers (this book was written when she was like 80 or something - so well after the facts) that he seemed uneasy but perhaps was unable to access the emotional intelligence part of his being to communicate or perceive what was happening. 

Anyway, she and George manage to buy a car and take off on an epic road trip west. (cars were in their early stages of development y'all.) Harrington is left to his research. Eventually, she and George married and started a little homestead outside of San Diego where they raised 5 more children. 

The focus of her book is on her life with Harrington and the idiosyncrasies that marked his character and their adventures. But her romance and the sweetness of her life with George Laird definitely are a big part of the story.

She also later published a book called the Chemeheuvis which I checked out and skimmed through. It is full of details about that people group - their language, customs, social organization, and mythology. It's amazing. It's based on all the recordings she was given by her husband George Laird prior to his death. 

This is one gal I would have loved to meet - and maybe I will!

Attractive Resourceful Woman encounters adventure, empowerment, and romance in the Klondike

Jefferson Randolph Smith alias "Soapy Smith" - an enterprising opportunistic adventure seeker wheeler dealer with a larger than life personality who relishes life on the gold frontier. Has made his living in various shady dealings and by relieving naive people of their hard earned money through offering various "investment" opportunities.

Tara Kane -  leaves San Francisco to search for her husband who left several years prior to strike it rich on the Alaskan gold frontier (before Alaska was a state.) She hasn't heard from him and their infant daughter has died leaving her bereft and free to set out to find him in the mysterious Yukon.

Daniel Kane - the missing husband who doesn't appear until the end of the story - posthumously 

Ernst Hart - German photographer who befriends and helps Tara on their initial boat voyage. He wants to capture the gold field in all its color and human interest.

Mrs. Miles - stern but warm-hearted self made woman who gives Tara a job and friendship.

The author writes "Tara is quite simply my ideal woman..."

Tara begins her journey as a fairly sheltered woman of her times. During the course of her search she learns how to drive a dog sled, camps in the arctic wilderness, shoots a man who attempts to assault and kill her, barters with prostitutes and charlatans, and develops a tenuous friendship with Soapy Smith whose favors and help she reluctantly receives at first. He doesn't give up and by the last third of the book they have adopted a child together and are unquestionably in love. He consults her and begins to craft his life and aspirations around her. (or so he claims) 

Hart continues to be her friend until she turns down his offer of marriage (typical.) 

The story ends with tumultuous political times of which Smith is the center. There is a gunfight which she witnesses. His antagonist has his back to Tara and Smith is shot down. She runs to his side and promises to marry him as he takes his last breath. 

It's not until she returns to San Francisco with her adopted son, that she learns that the opponent was actually her missing husband Daniel. The reader never knows whether Soapy suppressed her ability to find him or if the husband simply was idiotic enough to leave his gorgeous brave wife and then to ignore her highly publicized attempts to find him in the wilderness. 

But one (like the author) can't but admire her courage and the story is well-crafted and not really that predictable. 

Unschooler before John Holt pioneered the term

Terry is a six-year-old boy who doesn't want to go to school. In the pre-WWII Florida Everglades - his friend Mr. McCree has much more captivating things going on. 

This little Tom Sawyer says goodbye to his mom but instead of going to school evades the truant officer and visits the packinghouses, his friend LuBelle and her grandma, and his kindred spirit friend and old man named McCree who lives off the land and makes a bit of a living by selling plants, pinecones, and other Everglade items. 

McCree loves teaching him how to count, fish with his bare hands, make natural medicines, and drive his ancient truck. Society can't get over the fact that Terry's not in the four walls of a school building. His mom is at her wit's end trying to coerce him into going. His dad is busy with his work leading and organizing migrant worker camps.

Little Terrance "Terry" persists in his adventures. Eventually, he runs away for a few days and ends up rescuing McCree who falls out of a tree and breaks his leg. Terry never leaves his side. The whole incident ends up in a poignant court scene where all concerned are taught a lesson about life, relationships, and true learning.

As someone who learned about unschooling when my kids were small  - thanks to my friend Emilee and the influence of some eclectic friends in London, I became exposed to a different theory of life and learning that has influenced the upbringing of our kids in dramatic ways.

I am ever so grateful. Combine this exposure with a generational heritage of independent thinking and a "question the authorities" mentality. The book is charming and actually based on the true childhood of the author's husband. 

The Circle closes - romance and misguided zeal - Michener's Hawaii

The intrepid, emotional, charismatic, and infamous sea captain is the hero - but the excerpt of this novel called "From the Farm of Bitterness" is mostly the painfully accurate portrayal of protestant missionary activity in Hawaii during the early 1800s (1822) - as always Michener has fictionalized characters and throws in some actual ones. 

A tiny descendent of Puritans graduates from Yale and basically enters into an arranged marriage with a young lady of the appropriate family who ironically is heartbroken in wait of her seafaring love Captain 

Hoxworth who later proves to be everything that Abner Hale is not. In despair, she turns to religion in her solace and decides that being a missionary's wife on a faraway island is the perfect place to deposit her ardour. 

The couple embarks and just happens to encounter a vessel returning to New England guided by Captain Hoxworth who is returning to claim his bride Jerusha. He has renovated his entire cabin to make it comfortable for her only to discover that she's married to "this worm" as he refers to Abner. He storms onto their boat and demands to see her. 

Over the course of the years, you begin to ascertain that Captain Hoxworth never fully recovers from his devotion to her. She fully commits to her new life and probably is the most "successful" in that she actually shows love and respect for the people.

Abner Hale's "missionary" endeavors are fraught with disdain for the culture, misguided efforts, and zeal without love. The island has already been ravaged by European diseases and unhealthy dependencies. The only influence that seems positive is that of discouraging infanticide. 

Captain Hoxworth shows up on occasion - his boat met eagerly by naked native girls eager to "earn" goods and provisions that the sailors can provide. At one point he is horrified by Jerusha's strenuous poverty-stricken life and work-worn status. He rages at the stubborn Hale and is even party to their house being burnt down in his rage. 

In later years he has a complete New England house shipped and constructed for them in some kind of attempt at recompense. (ever romantic and grand gesturey - Hoxworth - stealing the show again.) Ultimately Hale becomes discouraged in the lack of "success" of his mission. He never even allows native converts to take on leadership and they eventually revert to their old ways. 

Jerusha dies and Captain Hoxworth returns and marries a beautiful Hawaiian woman. Their daughter ends up marrying Abner and Jerusha's son Micah and thus the circle is closed. 

Mitigate every Risk with Huxley

 

Isaiah 8:11 "The Lord spoke to me with his strong hand upon me, warning me not to follow the way of this people. He said: 'Do not call conspiracy everything that these people call conspiracy; do not fear what they fear, and do not dread it. The Lord Almighty is the one you are to regard as holy, he is the one you are to fear, he is the one you are to dread, and he will be your sanctuary; but for both houses of Israel he will be a stone that causes men to stumble and a rock that makes them fall...' Bind up the testimony and seal up the law among my disciples. I will wait for the Lord, who is hiding his face from the house of Jacob. I will put my trust in him."

I'm so grateful that I don't have to put my trust in horses, chariots, presidents, kings, or the DMV. 

I like it fine when those systems work. I like it when there is a semblance of order. I appreciate the sacrifice leaders at the local, state, and national level do to preserve a degree of stability. I try not to undervalue the lives of people that do hard things to keep up safe. 

I tend to be skeptical of power whether it be governmental or corporate. I don't think either of those entities is particularly charitable. I don't get my panties in a knot about administrations. I just try to vote for the ones that are going to promote less government instead of more. Pretty simple. 

I think it's important for me to start with evaluating myself and then move outwards from there - myself, my house, my family, my church, my neighborhood, my city and then maybe I could have an opinion about something else if I'm doing my best in all these areas. 

What does this have to do with the book? Well, I guess just thinking about dystopian books and dystopian times. I try not to get upset if the descriptions of people in this book resemble those of brainwashed clone troopers that live in my country and world--people who repeat soundbites and seem to have no idea what they even mean--people who care more about saying the right thing than doing anything worthwhile.

Entirely too many words. She says as she spits more words into the universe.

Literary level--Huxley is a little too sciencey for my taste. He gets into the science of test tube babies and stuff like that. He has fun with it. I kind of skimmed over that stuff. I read this book in high school and I know the gist of what he's satirizing--a world devoid of extreme emotions. A world where folks are anaesthetized with pleasure and drugs into being submissive factory tools. I get it! I feel like I'm on the brink sometimes. It's so much easier (and cheaper) to watch Netflix then to go and experience something for myself. All the exciting stuff of life - like becoming an entrepreneur or having an adventure in nature require too many permits... (at least in this state lol) It's a sterile world devoid of intimacy, mess, melancholy, or risk. 

Certain people want to take away risks so that no one ever experiences pain or want. Spoken as someone who has never gone without food or shelter, I acknowledge that it's easy for me to talk about freedom and risk. I have a credit card, a car, husband, family who are there for me etc etc... I just am not convinced that we do people favors by mitigating every single risk. Dull Dull. 

Got to go! Got to monitor my daughter's return from the grocery store. Oh the irony!

Takeaways from Rita

 

Library y'all! Rita Coolidge was a rising star in the sixties heyday when folksy southerners melded into the rock scene with brits and others. Rita Coolidge formed the band Walela in later years and I love!!!! Unabashed Indian junkie. 

Positive takeaways:

 - singing isn't just about having this perfect voice and pipes. It's also about connecting to the song and the listeners!! I really love when artists perform their own songs even when their voices aren't spectacular - it's about the expression and the meaning behind the art. I'm not downplaying working hard and being talented. I'm just saying - no one should have a patent on art as expression. I love her voice.

 - At one point she talked about being tired of performing her same famous songs that everyone wanted to hear. She wanted to transition to her new stuff. She made a connection by going to a concert herself and realizing how for the audience - the live performance was fresh and exciting. Performing is for the listener too. I think this could be applied to lots of things we do that seem repetitious to us (teaching, massage therapy, etc... cooking) but perhaps to others is new and exciting and means a great deal. We have to try to get into their perspective in order to keep it fresh for us as well. 

 - you may have had a horrible night, feel awful. and tired - but if you don't tell anyone they won't know! I am always so aware of my limitations when it comes to energy, but I think this is kind of like a "fake it til you make it" kind of self therapy that sometimes is effective when dealing with fatigue and you can still get out there and perform, speak, work, whatever it is - if you need to.

 - 

Charming and Scientific fiction about an Eskimo girl

 

I ordered this book with instructional funds from our charter school along with other young adult fiction that was recommended by Ambleside Online. My daughter never read it. One of the things I valued as a parent while raising my girls in their pre-adolescent phase was reading aloud. I only dug in my heels hard on a few things really and one of them was I insisted on reading aloud to them regularly. Not everyone was always happy about it. Hub never grew up being read aloud to it it wasn't in his lexicon of parenting. The other thing I insisted on was camping and hiking. A lot of other things were pretty negotiable: eating habits, bedtimes, showering. About a year ago, I think I finally gave up. Both of my girls read prolifically and they flat out told me that reading aloud together wasn't a priority. 

This book was one I imagined reading together, but I pulled it out and finally read it on my own. Hub and I actually started it together, but we got bogged down with some of the detailed wolf stuff. The author actually went to Alaska and spent weeks observing wolves so her science in this book is amazing - in regards to the behaviors of wolves, how they survive, and communicate with one another within the hierarchy of the pack. This is interesting to me - but only in the broad strokes version - so I skimmed over some of the more detailed accounts.

The latter part of the book got into the sub culture of the Inuit tribe that the author had also done a great job researching. This part is my passion: the anthropology stuff of indigenous groups so I read every word of that section. Jean Craighead George is just a great writer. I love how she is succinct but artful.

The relationship between Miyax and her dad Kapugen was particularly charming.

firsthand account of life with a Yokut tribe

 

I'm really curious about the artwork on the front of this book. I tried to do some research about it, but I'm not sure if it's an impressionistic drawing of a tule reed or something? My grandma wanted to read this. It is out of print and it's a shame because it's amazing. I haven't even finished it yet, but I'm hoping to soon. Latta was a California historian. This particular book is based off of interviews with a man dubbed "Uncle Jeff" who lived much of his childhood with a Yokut Tribe near the San Joaquin valley before the turn of the century. It has pictures and fascinating information about how the tribe lived. It was really rare to be able to have such a unique account. I hope to read more of Latta's work. 

What is heartbreaking, is that the interviewee never talked much about his experiences prior to this because there was so much bias against Indians. Basically people never wanted to hear anything positive about them. His account is very balanced and factual. 

Well crafted western with authentic characters and realistic livestock descriptions

 

Texas again! A hardbitten settler based off of the real life type of Charles Goodnight, fights his way to becoming an established rancher alongside a faithful sidekick named Homer. The story flashes back and forth between a trial when he is an older man and past episodes which unveil his back story. 

The story is well crafted and historically accurate. It combines an element of mystery with authentic characters and very realistic details about cattle, horses, ranching, and the area in which is was based near the Brazos river. 

"She had quickly acquired the American habit of addressing all problems as violently as possible"

 

I grabbed this at the library! Yes, my first visit to the hallowed halls of a library since covid response shut everything down. It was a lovely reunion. I must have navigated to the fiction or western section or something. I have never read McMurtry - most famous because his book Lonesome Dove became a popular mini series (I think in the 80s). Anyway I had this impression that it was a soapy kind of crowd pleaser thing - which it may be because I still haven't read it have I?

This is apparently the first book of a series of books about a family called the Berrybenders. This book was awash with characters and caricatures. There might not have been a fantastic plot - it's more like a series of interesting descriptions and predicaments while the family winds their way down the Missouri on a steamboat. It's not predictable. The main love interest that arises is between the oldest daughter Tasmin (great name!) and a frontiersman who everyone reveres who pops out of the wildabrush in his birthday suit. This novel is definitely not Victorian, but neither were the Indians or English gentry and their entourage. 

I kind of enjoyed it, but I'm not sure if I'll continue the series. McMurtry knows his history and is kind of a reluctant writer of westerns but his dialogues really flow. He's a famed Texican. Here's a sample

             "It just slipped out sir, I swear it." Tasmin said, timorously- her brains rattled like peas from the                violence of his shaking and her teeth cracked against one another."

     "I'll do better-I promise no curse will escape my lips," she said, desperate to undo the damage her careless outburst had caused. But it was too late. Those flinty eyes looked into hers for a moment and then the Sin Killer turned and left. Before her incompetent brother could properly beach the pirogue, the gray plains had swallowed him up."

            "I say, who is that gentleman you were wrestling with Tassie, in the year of our Lord 1832?" Bess asked, in her most grating tone. Tasmin at once slapped her sharply-- she had quickly acquired the American habit of addressing all problems as violently as possible.

You can see why this kind of wit and insight is amusing! 

Orphan Train - a fictional account of an historical movement ("an historic" when will that fall out of use?)

 

Source: Readers Digest condensed novels from my mom and Grandma. These editions usually contain a story about WWII. I generally avoid those. This one is a fictional account of the historical orphan train movement which occurred in the 1800s. 

Here's the account from wiki: he Orphan Train Movement was a supervised welfare program that transported children from crowded Eastern cities of the United States to foster homes located largely in rural areas of the Midwest. The orphan trains operated between 1854 and 1929, relocating about 250,000 children. The co-founders of the Orphan Train movement claimed that these children were orphaned, abandoned, abused, or homeless, but this was not always true. They were mostly the children of new immigrants and the children of the poor and destitute families living in these cities.

In this story, a "spinster" - poor 27 year old throwback lol, takes on somewhat by default, due to her uncle's sudden heart seizure, the leadership of transporting a group of unruly street children out to be placed with new families. The story is heartwarming, includes romance (yay), tragedy, and depicts certain hardships and realities of the times in which it is set. 

the Mogollon Rim (pronounce it right btw! Mug - ee - own)

 

This book isn't really about Nevada, the state. It's about a dude named Nevada, or nicknamed Nevada,  should say. He calls himself Nevada to hide his true identity as "Jim Lacy" a slick gunfighter with a past. 

He's the typical Zane Gray protagonist - sorrowful past which led to a corrupt life, possesses the glacier beneath the iceberg of noble heart just waiting for an angelic maiden to transform and redeem him into the white hatted hero that he was meant to be. 

I find Zane Gray females to be pretty one dimensional but I really love his nature descriptions. This book in particular interested me because the majority of the story takes place around the Mogollon Rim in Arizona which is near Payson where I was born. Last Summer, my girls and I travelled there and sat atop this picturesque rim overlooking the Tonto basin. Zane Grey actually kept a hunting cabin in the area which has now been relocated to Payson alongside a museum of local history. His writing and the fact that he had a place there suggests that he loved the area. It comes across in his writing.

I want to get back there and explore some more. 

poignant/humorous portrayal of reservation life and cultural tension

Overdrive - e book - first recommended by Grandma Rose

Befitting my all things native reading and watching kick.... I started this book years ago but it offended my Victorian sensibilities. Those sensibilities are still firmly in place. I just try not to throw someone's story out if I want to learn about a sub culture which is different from my own. For goodness sakes, I read the Good Earth when I was in fifth grade and it was pretty "earthy," not titillating just accurate. 

Sherman Alexie has an authentic voice and I love his cartoons. Depiction of reservation life near Spokane Washington and the realistic tension between his desire to escape the downward spiral that seemed to trap his counterparts on the reservation and the part of himself that was firmly and deeply rooted to his heritage and people. He joins a "white" school and learns to thrive there, but this means facing derision at home and foregoing his best friend and protector "Rowdy." There is a reconciliation of sorts but the tension is visceral. 

 

Gritty Memoir

 

Was thinking about the PCT because I chatted with some hikers near Kernville a few weekends ago. I love hiking and the PCT is kind of a tantalizing dream of mine.

I had heard about this book some years back and had started the audio version but never finished. I read the e book version through overdrive. The author is poignant, personal, honest, and has plenty of dry humor which I appreciated. 

I admire her grit in taking on this challenge alone. It sounds like it was a healing and truly wild journey for her. 

Luck or the law of attraction is a thing - are you a believer?

 

I'm still trying to remember how I got my hands on this book! I thought my friend Emilee gave it to me for Christmas, but she didn't remember it.

Anyway, I read it very slowly in the mornings over this busy Spring and so I think the best way to make an account of it as I sit here procrastinating on other "admin" projects is to list the chapter titles.

1. The element - what it means to find your thing, your passion, your zone, 

2. Think differently - break out of the bonds of societal and traditional school emphases

3. Beyond Imagining - imagine it and do it!

4. In the zone - what can you lose yourself in?

5. finding your tribe - it's not just what you want to do, but who you want to be with.

 - he gives lots of good examples- Meg Ryan in this chapter! Love her.

6. What will they think? Let go of people pleasing

7. Do you feel lucky? - basically the attraction principle - the power of positive thinking - abundance mentality - serendipity - also known as luck - but it has to do with your posture and openness

8. Somebody help me - find a mentor

9. Is it too late - you're not too old to find your element - this is getting closer to home, ouch

10. For love or money - your "element" doesn't have to support you financially

that's what Liz Gilbert says in Big Magic too!

11. Making the grade - changing how we think about education - preaching to the choir! 

Cynthia Ann and Quanah - you don't want to miss them

Source: My daughters and I went to Barnes and Noble where I got stuck in the Native American section. There are no chairs in there now, to discourage lingering in light of Covid I suppose. I ended up lingering on the floor next to this section. I took pictures of interesting looking books and then I checked this one out at the library. 

It was well worth it. Plus, it coincided nicely with Blood Brothers about Cochise - neighboring tribes and similar time period - civil war, pre, and post. These are Comanches, that one was a fictional account but centered on Cochise and the apaches.

Like the Apaches, the Comanches were loosely aligned small tribal groups. There numbers were not expansive even prior to the slaughtering of their buffalo and encroachment and seizure on their ancestral lands. This was partially due to the rigorous horseback lifestyle that made childbearing a challenge. They were the quintessential nomadic hunter-gatherers. They did no farming and moved about every three weeks. I already knew about how the Comanches had mastered horsemanship like no other, having learned from the Spaniards who initially introduced horses to North America. Horses transformed a once incongruous and marginalized tribe into the most powerful and warlike plains people of North America. 

Into this world, Cynthia Ann Parker was inducted at age nine after being taken in a raid on a fort. Her pioneering family: who became prominent Texans, the Parkers, naively left their base camp and fort unprotected and many people were killed and children and one woman abducted. Cynthia Ann, like other young children was eventually adopted into the tribe, married a powerful chief, and bore children. She completely immersed herself in the culture and rejected multiple attempts to be reunited with anglo culture. Finally, after a massive battle she was forcibly taken by whites and returned to her relatives along with her small daughter. She was forced to leave behind her two sons, one of which Quanah - protagonist of this non fiction story and eventual warrior, leader, and reservation politician in later years. Cynthia Ann never assimilated back into anglo world. She continually tried to run away, she was paraded like a circus animal, and died at a heartbreakingly young age, never able to return to her heart tribe and sons. Their way of life was coming to an end.

Another interesting figure of this book was a small in stature Texas Ranger Jack Hays who would go on to revolutionize warfare in the west. He commanded a daring band of border ruffians and trained them to live and fight like Comanches. They eventually got their hands on and helped adapt what would be known as the Walker Colt - the first repeating revolver. Prior to this, the typical easterner with his one long rifle stood little chance against a fearless Comanche who rode at a full gallop with at least 6 weapons to hand. 

The other interesting thing - a portion about the pensive leader Mackenzie who always downplayed his heroism and role so much that few people knew about his merit as a commander and fighter until after his death. The part about Quanah Parker was fascinating. He was a true pragmatist. Once he realized the warrior and buffalo days were over, he embraced the anglo life and became a leader of his people uniting them in a completely novel way and calling himself the first Comanche Chief - he would also be the last.

He cleverly managed to make money on cattle despite the Indian Agency's corruption and the absolute ineptitude of the federal government to reasonably handle or understand the natives. He became friends with his once foe Mackenzie and learned from him. He built an imposing house for his many wives and children and never turned anyone away from his table. He was known for his generosity and lobbied the government for fair treatment. 

Sadly, he died fairly young but left an interesting legacy. 

 

 

Cochise and Tom Jeffers

Source: my grandma

This is a historical novel portraying the relationship between Cochise and Tom Jeffers. It was really well done. I love this book.

Perhaps the creative license with Jeffers' romantic liaisons was a little mushy (little is known of Jeffers romantic relationships and he never officially married) and his depiction of Indian life might be idealized, but all in all it seems to be historically accurate and is thoughtfully and powerfully written.

The saga of white relations with native tribes is painful. The main idea is that a noble individual can rise above the stereotypes and errors of their own race or group and through embracing truth and honor can overcome cross cultural barriers to unite in friendship. 

There is a kind of mysticism that pervades this book. This is one of the reasons why I enjoyed it so much. There is more than just a retelling of events. The book captures the mystical tie that both of these individuals had for the land itself and eventually for one another. 

They faced criticism from their own groups and persecution from without. They held onto a creed that was deep within. As a recovering people pleaser, this profoundly inspires me. 

Like studying the tribal groups of the Eurasian steppes and other groups who lived and thrived in seemingly hostile terrain, the apaches are fascinating. They achieved a mastery over their own bodies that to our times seems supernatural. They had rigid rules of conduct which helped them to remain united and function as a unit. Their leadership was a combination of hereditary but strength based and based on tanistry like in Scotland: 

    "Sometimes the king’s son became tanist, but not because the system of primogeniture was in any way recognized. Indeed, the only principle adopted was that the dignity of chieftainship should descend to the eldest and most worthy of the same blood, who well could be a brother, nephew, or cousin. This system of succession left the headship open to the ambitious and was a frequent source of strife both within families and between clans." https://www.britannica.com/topic/tanistry

Unlike in England where the oldest son inherited, even if he was a raging idiotic lunatic, this system took note of heredity but was largely based on battle prowess and leadership qualities. 

 

Mindset - not just for "Go-Getters"

                                                 

source: sister and bro

I feel like self help books are often written by Type A go-getters. Except for the more new age ones perhaps like Eckhart Tolle's The Power of Now. 

This is no exception.

However, there are some great takeaways even for your less industrious type who wants to pay for wi-fi but maybe not become a CEO. This book fleshes out growth mindset and how it plays out in many arenas: business, sports, parenting, teaching, marriage...

• imploding the idea of "the natural.
• embracing a humble, learning, posture - learning from failure and success
• developing in relationships - the active model - vs. the magical thinking
• teachers and parents - instilling the growth model

I think one of the things I am most aware of is the difficulty I have in asking for feedback and in accepting criticism. I'm kind of hard on myself already and maybe I feel like I'm already doing enough of a good job in being hard on myself so I don't want to ask someone else to be hard on me?

I'm an hsp (highly sensitive person). How this has played out in my life, is that I trained all the people who love me to never criticize me or be harsh to me because the result was me completely melting down. This type of climate doesn't make for the best self development. I wanted to be a natural at everything and so if I wasn't, I tended not to pursue it. If I received criticism, I tended to want to abandon whatever the said pursuit was. Thankfully, we had a family business in cattle ranching where I was subject to some direction and correction (and it wasn't always conveyed in the most diplomatic manner) - which is probably a saving grace for my character development. I couldn't become a complete egg shell wearer. I also wasn't allowed to quit!

I notice that I'm sometimes reluctant to try very hard. This is falling prey to the "if I fail if I haven't tried hard, than I will somehow shield myself from disappointment." My mom once noticed me doing this in a track race while I was cruising the 800 and not really giving it my all. 

I quit volleyball once because the coach critiqued me. I didn't like his personality and I decided that I didn't care about varsity volleyball. 

I've tried to parent with focusing on effort rather than talent. Praising specific achievements rather than general "smartness," "talent," "athleticism," etc. 

I think just generally combating laziness is the kicker. I have had to apply this to using technology- something that once scared me worse than facing a longhorn steer head on. In college I tried to submit my papers hand written - then I finally started typing them up but was still resistant up until getting my first smart phone 5 years after everyone else I knew had one. 

Thankfully I have people in my life who model G.M. and encourage me to move forward and keep learning and growing. I don't want to be entirely left behind!

Scottish woman throws off Victorian shackles

I was surprisingly drawn in by this story. I haven't been that into fiction lately so the fact that I wasn't pushing myself through this book, at least the first half of it anyway, was great!

The story is narrated through journal entries and letters the protagonist writes to her mother in Scotland. We're talking about turn of the century (1900) but the book actually ends up narrating almost her entire adult life but the first half of the book conveys her early adult years and the events that lead her to becoming a permanent expat in Japan.

As a young girl, she becomes engaged to a British military guy and although she has met him at least once, it feels like a mail order bride situation as she is on a boat bound for China accompanied by a strict chaperone. You already see her chafing under the bridle of British customs and expectations as she ventures out on her first independent journey away from the sheltered and very Victorian world of her mother's home. 

She undergoes a series of adventures on her voyage including the death of her reluctant chaperone. She finally arrives in China and wades through troubled waters (already emerging) into marriage with a man who the reader can sense may not be entirely compatible. Her life in China is isolating and boring. She isn't able to do housework as the servants don't like it and her only interaction is with a few other expat women. She does make friends with an influential French couple who take her under their wing. 

She has a baby and along the way meets a seemingly impassive Japanese military guy named Count Kurihama. Turns out he has a sense of humor and they make a connection. During a military siege when her husband is away, she encounters him at his mountain temple whilst on a summer retreat with her French friends. One thing leads to another and she comes home only to discover that she is carrying his child. When her husband returns and finds out, he turns her out and she is denied access to her daughter Jane. As she waits for "deportation" in a hotel, she receives a surprise visitor. Turns out "Kentaro" had been keeping an eye on her in case of such an event. He arranges passage for her to Japan where he houses her with several servants in a cottage. She becomes a "kept" woman, only being visited by him well after her son is born. Her son looks very Japanese. She and Kentaro still have a strong connection, although he has a wife and kids.

One day her son and maid disappear. She soon realizes that Kentaro has arranged this in order to legitimize his son amongst the hierarchy. He was sent to an adopted aristocratic family to take his place amongst the nobility.

She is devastated but feels powerless. She rejects his further financial support and goes out in business on her own, establishing herself as a financial consultant for "western" dress becoming fairly successful. The rest of the book, sort of sums up her mature adult years as she settles herself into society and becomes an independent woman. She never quite ties herself to another man, and comes to understand that Count Kurihama is always looking out for her one way or another. She has several romantic liaisons but never anything that is powerful enough for her to surrender her independence. Her mother never responds to her letters again and her "husband' eventually dies. She has no contact with her daughter until in her later years during World War II writes to her and asks her to come stay with her.

She sees a tennis champion eventually who she suspects is her son. (I find it hard to believe that she was never able to track him down over all the years.)

She purchases a dream property that is eventually devastated by a typhoon but recovers it and expands. Kentaro makes a surprise appearance after the death of his wife and they pick up their romantic attachment for a short time. He proposes, but, when he refuses to allow her to make contact with her son, she turns his proposal down, but implies that he may still visit her. 

The final scene shows her being evacuated from Japan on a ship during WWII. Suddenly a Japanese military commander appears and requests audience. We come to understand that Kentaro has arranged this and it is her son. Finally a reunion! The reunion is shrouded in formality and no outright show of emotion, nonetheless the reader feels a sense of satisfaction and resolution to the separation. 

I felt like I wanted to hate Count Kurihama for the patriarchal nonsense. But I could not. He is portrayed as an honorable man trying to do his duty as best he saw it. He relaxed his views on the role of women in many ways in his relationship to the emancipated protagonist Mary Mclaren. It's almost as if a samurai warrior from the middle ages stepped into a time and place where he didn't belong. I felt the attraction and so did Mary. She never hated him. She understood that he had a role to fill that superseded his own emotions and proclivities. She was attracted by his fierceness as much as she realized it wouldn't work for her as a permanent arrangement. He was drawn to her independence for the same reason.

There are a lot of themes around the topic of feminism that could be explored in this book. Her lack of parental rights - another friend flees Japan because she feels it is the only way she can assert reproductive rights... There is a Japanese woman who is an activist for women but suffers persecution and imprisonment, however Mary feels that since she is wealthy, she has a safety net that allows her take risks and refuse the protection of a man. 

All in all, it was an interesting read and definitely not predictable.